The Unknown

Shaun and I have been feeling really uncertain lately about what God's plan for our family is. We've been trying to be less anxious or concerned about what we don't know, but we're both more of the type A personalities, and it's been hard to be at a standstill as we itch to do something--anything--rather than just waiting for something (or waiting for nothing! We really don't know).

We're SO happy with our kids and life the way it is. If we're done having kids, we're happy with how things are and it'll all be okay--we just wish we knew. But we don't know, and even though the unknown is hard, I don't believe God lets us go through tough stuff that won't ultimately help us become better, and closer to him.

A favorite quote of ours (displayed in our kitchen) is from Neil A. Maxwell: "Faith in God includes faith in his timing." I know that, even though we're stuck in a weird kind of limbo right now, not sure what direction to go, that God is watching over us. I read a really good talk about faith from Dallin H. Oaks, where he says "Faith must include trust." He tells the story of Christ suffering for the sins of the world in Gethsemane, and the infamous line: "Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me; nevertheless, not my will, but thine be done." (Luke 22:42) Christ is the ultimate example of faith and trust in our Heavenly Father. Faith without trust is incomplete, and so, my faith in God, my faith in his plan for me and my family, and my faith that his timing is what's right for us, needs to include complete trust that, whatever the future holds, he knows what he's doing, and all will be right in the end.

So, as we wait, and wonder what the future holds, I am committing (or rather recommitting) to strive to put my trust more fully in my Heavenly Father. I know he knows what he's doing, and I know he loves me. 

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